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First Date

first dateThere used to be a problem to get acquainted but it gradually had become a minor one. Now another one reveals itself – it’s the first date problem. Damn, you don’t feel at ease. You talk well and then (BANG!) you say something stupid confusing the girl. Here is another boo – how do I make her want to kiss – that’s what upsets me the most!

Let’s start with a universal truth – you shouldn’t be afraid to say anything at your first date. If you feel free and relaxed and if you talk about what you want it will help you to remain self-confident and independent of the circumstances and the girl. It doesn’t mean that you can curse and tell dumb jokes.

Just try to behave as if you have found yourself at last in the place where you can relax and have a good rest, where you can be yourself, say and do whatever you want, joke and laugh, make fun of each other (you do make fun of each other with your friends, don’t you?)

Imagine that this person who is with you now gives you easiness and freedom. Don’t try to please her with everything you do. Let her notice that you feel good and let her try to experience the same – such things are catching and would pass on to another person quickly if the atmosphere is inviting.

First of all, care for enjoying the situation yourself. And then you could take an interest in what she likes. Add some brashness, debauchery, humor and mystery to your naturalness. Imagine that you are playing a role of a great Lady-Killer who had conquered hundreds of fortresses (but don’t say it to her!) If something doesn’t work out at once, try and use any pause in your favor – remember that you should stay flexible.

There’s nothing shameful is confusing her – I love to confuse girls. They would blush at that, pout, their self-confidence dissolves and their eyes would become shifty – add some more and she would go off her head as much as you want her to. At the sight of it you smile and breathe in the air with the pleasure of anticipation which gives you confidence in your success. “Why are you confused? You’ve got a crush on me!” The more independently and boldly you behave the more your girl feels at ease with you. And that’s exactly what you want, isn’t it?

To make her want to kiss you should bring her naturally or accidentally to the situation you need. Naturalness of the moment may be tested easily: imagine hugging and kissing her at this very minute. If you feel that it is not quite appropriate, you should change your behavior and the atmosphere. You changed it, you tested it – do it! If it seems to be always out of place it means that your model of behavior needs basic reconsideration. 

Suddenness is being achieved like this: she’s expecting something natural from you, something like answering her question or passing her some bread and instead you are giving her a kiss. One of the variants would be “whispering something in her ear” and kissing her. You could kiss her at saying hello and good-bye; kiss her on her cheek or kiss her hand; having sneaked up kiss her on her neck. Or if she’s lost in thought you can kiss her on her ear saying “Smile!” That’s why try to shorten the distance between you gradually and increase the amount of your physical contacts.

And do not expect anything. Just watch what can come of it. “What if I try to confuse her? What will happen if I hug her tenderly? What will come of it if I try to kiss her?” Experience a child’s curiosity, do it out of mere interest and watch her reaction. As if it’s the first time you do it. Be self-confident! And before asking a question: “What do I do to make her feel good?” ask yourself a question: “What do I need to do to make ME feel good?”


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